if you wanna rock, i'm ready to roll.

Almost two weeks have passed since the last time I updated... Sorry about that. Time truly does fly here, which is something that I did not expect. As the countdown of the days until I see Justin again ticks by, I am trying to capture everything that I can on my camera. My adventure book is going to be huge. Good thing there's an awesome scrapbooking store in the Mall of America. That will have to be one of my stops in my short time at home between this adventure and my next one: NCIS internship. Man, time flies.

One thing of significance that happened in this time was that I celebrated my 21st birthday. A shout out to Kelsey and Mary for taking me out to lunch for the most delicious macaroni pie ever at the Auld Toon Cafe, and to Rose and Jesse for buying me a cute little cake. You all, along with my family (who I got to talk to on the phone!) and Justin (who I got to have a special Skype date with!) made my birthday very special, and I really appreciate it. Thank you. And also, thanks Mom and Dad, Dee and Mike, and Grandma for sending me cards. Getting mail is a very rare and much appreciated event here. :)

The other event of significance that occurred in my blogging lapse can only be described by a picture:
This is Castle Dunnottar, and it was the most magnificent thing I have ever seen. The hike out to see it was something else, and although we did not have the time to go inside (or rather, we were late, and were not allowed inside), it was still the most awe-inspiring experience so far. That structure is older than the country I was born and raised in. That structure, that overlooks the North Sea and the town of Stonehaven has more history in itself than the place I call home. It's so incredible, and it's hard to think about. And the beauty of it cannot be described by either words or pictures.

Hopefully there will be more pictures to come, as we are adventuring out to Inverness and Loch Ness this weekend. I fully intend to find the monster, by the way. And yes, I will be a complete and total tourist. Beware, Scotland. :)

It amazes me that I can continue to learn about myself, more each day. Before I left, I really thought I had me all figured out. But things here are so different that I am truly learning how I react to unknown situations. I have already figured out that Lady Antebellum is my calming music, Glee is my motivating music, and Daughtry is my let-out-my-frustration-by-walking-really-fast music. Everything else falls in between. I've learned the exhaustion leads to tears, and that I can truly get by only hearing Justin's voice once a week. I've learned that I was really out of shape at Hope, and that I can walk upwards of 15 miles in a day and still somehow be able to put one foot in front of the other. I've learned that I am completely dependent on the clock, and that the disorganization of this place drives me completely up the wall. Most importantly, I've learned that technology is the most beautiful thing. Who would have thought that there would be a time when a person could be across an ocean, and yet their family could track their movements and adventures on a computer screen? It's incredible, and even though technology is not my forte, I am definitely grateful for it.

Something else that I have learned here: I need my faith. I could never begin to guess what God's plan is for me, and I have never really considered that He has one. That was always one of the many issues that I have had with faith and religion: I wanted to make my own way. I didn't want to take a backseat to my own life. But in times like these, when I feel so lost, but yet so internally calm, I have to wonder... what does he have in mind for my life? So many things have happened that have made me believe that I was pushed in a certain direction by a force that was out of my control: taking personal finance in high school, choosing Hope, taking an RA position sophomore year, going into an apartment with girls I hardly knew, going to Scotland by myself. There is some sort of plan for me, and I need to acknowledge the presence that is all around me. Don't get me wrong, I still have my issues with organized religion. But I know what I believe, and even in the midst of all of this confusion in my life, I feel this immense serenity. It's peaceful, and it allows me to go on with my everyday life. I believe that everything will work out when I go back home. My life has a purpose, and I don't need to know what it is just now. That can wait, and I'll just enjoy the ride.

"You gotta live and learn. You gotta crash and burn. You gotta make some stances and take some chances. You gotta laugh and love and take all life has to give. You gotta live and learn, so you can learn to live."
-->Darius Rucker, "Learn to Live"