--> The Script, "For the First Time"
I spent the weekend in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. And it was awesome. Plus, it was my birthday weekend, which made it even better. I want to go there, truly. But we'll see what all happens. I have to see if I get an offer, for sure. But I loved it. It was wonderful.
My novel has led me down a very certain path. The protagonist and the antagonist are fighting for the guy, which is very different than I expected. But I like where it's going. I think it's better than what I intended it to be.
I've let a couple people read the beginning of it, and they all seem to like what I'm doing. I've only had a small amount of criticism, but that's to be expected from someone who expects perfection out of an imperfect world.
I find myself wishing to meet the guy I'm writing about. I doubt he exists, almost like the ridiculous men that are written about in romance novels and that star in romantic comedies. He's exactly what I want, but will never find, because I'm not convinced that anyone exists like him. I haven't found someone who can put up with me yet. I haven't found someone who is going to love me through my mistakes. Unconditionally, as they say. He... had conditions. They were never voiced, but I embarrassed him sometimes. I made him mad, frustrated. I need someone who will stand by me. So. I wrote him instead. Macon.
That's where I'm going to leave you, at this moment. I will finish my novel in two weeks, and I should be hearing from grad schools soon as well. Things are happening. I'll update soon.
"You think you know what you think you'll find. You think you'll figure me out tonight. But you'll never know what I won't share. I don't care, no, I don't care. You think you'll figure me out tonight, but I don't care. And I wonder if I'm just built this way. Every man that I know makes me feel like I'm too plain. When it's over, me and my selfish ways go back to start again."
-->Samantha Ronson, "Built this Way"
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